Thursday, March 1, 2007

Who's Next?

Recently saw Ghostrider this past Saturday and was thoroughly impressed with how many cheesy one-liners they managed to squeeze in without compelling me to take my shoe off right there in the middle of the theater and slap the person in front of me across the side of their face. In all seriousness, here's a few things I liked and disliked about the movie:

  • The animation. Props to Image Works for creating a truly screen-worthy Ghost Rider and bad-ass action sequences.
  • The pace. Unlike The Hulk, Ghost Rider progressed pretty quickly. At one point I remember thinking, "hmmm, seems like they're forcing it along here..." but before I could linger on that thought for too long something gnar-balls would start to happen and put a smile on my face sort of like the one on Lance Bass's face over here...except mine was gayer.
  • Nicholas Cage. His screen presence makes for a nice smokescreen behind which bad-writing is fervently doing the macarena.
-Things I didn't Like -
  • Bad writing/monologue.
  • Failure to fully capitalize on the "dark/bad-ass" potential the way Underworld did
  • With the commercialization of cinema you'd be hard pressed to watch a film and walk away saying, "Wow, that was completely original!" This is abrasively apparent for Ghost Rider. Like the rest you sheep, I too have been trained to swallow a certain degree of cliche-ness and in all honesty sometimes I really don't mind it, so long as I remind myself to take it for what it is - mindless entertainment. But when it comes to films Marvel puts its stamp of approval on I'm a bit more critical and I can't help but feeling like there wasn't even the slightest effort to attempt and introduce or develop certain characters in a unique way (i.e. "Mack" played by Donal Logue and "Caretaker" played by Sam Elliot a.k.a. stupid comedic relief guy and typical omniscient old dude respectively).
In the end I'm a biased Marvel/Nicholas Cage fan that will not only buy it when it comes out on DVD but would totally agree to see it again....so long as it was matinée and someone else was paying for me.

Enough with the Ghost Rider rant because the real question is just as my title says, "Who's Next?" So, who do I want to see next? Easy...

Captain America! This guy, by far the most underrated superhero by the general public and it's easy to see why. But rest assured, the Cap is a certified face melting bad ass. If you don't believe me I will fight you...or tell you to read the Civil War series. A lot of people are in the dark about Captain America. If you're one of them, don't feel bad, be proactive and take a moment to bask in the the gloriousness of his abilities listed below. Commence basking:


Wikipedia List of Abilities:
  • Peak of human potential
  • Expert in martial arts and hand-to-hand combat prowess as well as all terrain acrobatics
  • Master tactician and field commander
  • Wields vibranium-steel alloy shield - FYI: Cap's shield > Wolverine's claws. It's true, Adamantium cannot cut through a vibranium-steel alloy.
Abilities I've Witnessed:
  • Beyond-human speed (i.e. dodging bullets and lasers & ability to fight on par with super mutants)
  • Super strength (i.e. every time he blocks something with a greater impact/velocity than a bullet with his shield and doesn't break his arm or every time he throws his shield with enough velocity to decapitate multiple robots, chew through tanks and decimate anything else along its path only to finally bounce off a wall and return ever so nicely)
  • Photographic memory
  • Not 100% sure on this one...but I think he never tires in combat.
  • and probably many more that I've forgotten but will reserve this space for...
Abilities aside, Captain America is one of those elite superheroes where what they represent is what ultimately makes them unstoppable. Where the ideology behind the character gives it the ability to transcend any obstacle in its universe. America cannot be defeated and in the comic book world this leaves room for cannon, which would ensue that neither can he.

Another example of this would be Hulk's rage, which gives him infinite potential. Where it starts to get really interesting is when you bring these characters out of their universes, cross them over to some sort of neutral-verse and let their raw ideologies duke it out.


My Mom got this comic for me back in elementary for $49.95 at B. Dalton in the Sea Tac Mall! Thanks Mom!


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